Quotes by : Alan King

Comedy is a reflection. We create nothing. We set no styles, no standards. We're reflections. It's a....

Marriage is nature's way of keeping us from fighting with strangers.

We get the worrywart, the hypochondriac, the money-grubbing miser, the intractable negotiator... Some....

My father was a dreamer - my hero. He was a smart, tough guy from Poland, a cutter of lady's handbags,....

There's a charm, there's a rhythm, there's a soul to Jewish humor. When I first saw Richard Pryor perform,....

When I was in the hospital they gave me apple juice every morning, even after I told them I didn't like....

I learned to cook in self-defense. My wife doesn't know what a kitchen is. In the first month of our....

And humor has always been a weapon. You want to get even on somebody? You want to attack somebody? Make....

If you stop and think about it, nearly all great humor is at the expense of someone or something.

My wife is a very attractive woman, and she's always worried about her diet. But she doesn't pay attention....