Quotes by : Elayne Boosler

When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. It's a whole different....

I am thankful the most important key in history was invented. It's not the key to your house, your car,....

My ancestors wandered lost in the wilderness for forty years because even in biblical times men would....

I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how....

I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something is wrong with me.....

For a single woman preparing for company means wiping the lipstick off the milk carton.

I've thought for the last decade or so, the only actual place raw truth was seeping through in newspapers....

I'm just a person trapped inside a woman's body.

The Vatican is against surrogate mothers. Good thing they didn't have that rule when Jesus was born.

The Vatican is against surrogate mothers. Good thing they didn't have that rule when Jesus was born.