Quotes by : Spike Milligan

I thought I'd begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare but then I thought Why should I? He never reads....

Money can't buy friends but you can get a better class of enemy.

I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge.

Money can't buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.

Said Hamlet to Ophelia,I'll draw a sketch of thee.What kind of pencil shall I use?2B or not 2B?

Money can't buy friends but you can get a better class of enemy.

After Puckoon I swore I'd never write another book. This is it

Money couldn't buy friends, but you got a better class of enemy.

Life wasn't too bad. The trouble with Man was, even while he was having a good time, he didn't appreciate....

My Father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic.