Quotes by : David Letterman

We inadvertently bombed the Chinese Embassy. But Clinton now is working very hard. He has sent a letter....

Based on what you know about him in history books, what do you think Abraham Lincoln would be doing if....

She represents the country Alamonia.

It's so warm now, and Thanksgiving came so early - is it just me, or does it not really feel like Ramadan?....

There's only one requirement of any of us, and that is to be courageous. Because courage, as you might....

I cannot sing, dance or act; what else would I be but a talk show host.

This guy put the suck in success.

Ladies and gentlemen after what I've been through I am happy just to be wearing clothes that open in....

Labour day is a great American holiday that peoplecelebrate by going out and buying products made in....

The White House is giving George W. Bush intelligence briefings. You know, some of these jokes just write....

There's no business like show business, but there are several businesses like accounting.