Quotes by : Evan Esar

The quizzical expression of the monkey at the zoo comes from his wondering whether he is his brother's....

Hope is tomorrow's veneer over today's disappointment.

Many a man who falls in love with a dimple makes the mistake of marrying the whole girl.

Conscience is what makes a boy tell his mother before his sister does.

Definition of a Statistician: A man who believes figures don't lie, but admits than under analysis some....

America believes in education: the average professor earns more money in a year than a professional athlete....

Housework is what a woman does that nobody notices unless she hasn't done it.

Housework is what woman does that nobody notices unless she hasn't done it.

Canada's climate is nine months winter and three months late in the fall.

Definition of Statistics: The science of producing unreliable facts from reliable figures.

Zoo: An excellent lace to study the habits of human beings