Quotes by : Jay London

I was going to buy a book on hair loss, but the pages kept falling out.

I recorded my hair this morning, tonight I'm watching the highlights.

I went to the doctor and he said I had acute appendicitis, and I said compared to who?

My father would take me to the playground, and put me on mood swings.

I wanted to take up music, so my father bought me a blunt instrument. He told me to knock myself out.....

I saw a stationery store move.

It all started when my dog began getting free roll over minutes.

My whole family is lactose intolerant and when we take pictures we can't say cheese.

My girlfriend bought me a down jacket, she said it fit my personality.