Quotes by : Ron White

Other states are trying to abolish the death penalty... mine's putting in an express lane.

I believe when life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade...and try to find someone whose life has....

I've got a role in the new Billy Bob Thornton movie that Billy Bob wrote and is going to direct called....

I had the right to remain silent... but I didn't have the ability.

I think honest communication, no matter where it comes from, is positive for a relationship.

All I know how to do is take what's on my mind and spit it out funny. I don't know what else I could....

The next time you have a thought... let it go.

The way my brain processes information is quite odd. I mean, I have Attention Deficit Disorder and another....

A lot of people can find something to laugh at in my humor, I guess.

There were years when I was a beer and tequila guy, then I got real fat. And then I found that you could....