Quotes by : Roseanne Barr

I survived my childhood by birthing many separate identities to stand in for one another in times of....

I figure when my husband comes home from work, if the kids are still alive, then I've done my job.

The thing women have got to learn is that nobody gives you power. You just take it.

As a housewife, I feel that if the kids are still alive when my husband gets home from work, then hey,....

And, you know, I liked writing humor. Well, I should say, I wanted to write seriously, but it kept turning....

The most out-there thing I’m saying is, ‘Don’t have babies. Don’t get married and have kids.....

Take this marriage thing seriously - it has to last all the way to the divorce.

To expect life to treat you good is foolish as hoping a bull won't hit you because you are a vegetarian.....

Men read maps better than women because only men can understand the concept of an inch equaling a hundred....

My hope is that gays will be running the world, because then there would be no war. Just a greater emphasis....