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Author - W. C. Fields
Quotes by : W. C. Fields
New Year's
I never worry about being driven to drink I just worry about being driven home.
money
When asked to borrow money: "I'll see what my lawyer says. . . . And if he says yes I'll get another....
Hate
I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.
drinking
We frequently hear of people dying from too much drinking. That this happens is a matter of record. But....
success
If at first you don't succeed try try again. Then quit. There's no use being a damn fool about it.....
marriage
No man is boss in his own home but he can make up for it by making a dog play dead.
Me
Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live....
merry
Once during Prohibition I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.
Sleep
Sleep - the most beautiful experience in life - except drink.
eat
It was a woman who drove me to drink - and you know I never even thanked her.
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