Quotes by : W. C. Fields

When we have lost everything, including hope, life becomes a disgrace, and death a duty.

Women are like elephants. They are interesting to look at but I wouldn't like to own one.

I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.

Set up another case bartender! The best thing for a case of nerves is a case of Scotch.

If at first you don't succeed try try again. Then quit. There's no use being a damn fool about it.....

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.

No man is boss in his own home but he can make up for it by making a dog play dead.

Once during Prohibition I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.

Hell, I never vote for anybody, I always vote against.

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.