Quotes by : Eugene Mirman

High School: Oh, man. This is where boys and girls go from tweens to teens and become complicated and....

Some PR is about getting information about a great product or thingy out to the people who would enjoy....

Do whatever you want. Break stuff, touch your penis or boobs to anything, whatever.

If things are really overwhelming and you need to talk, you can give me a call at 347-273-2044.

Think of me as an impetuous Hegel, drunk with power, and also, regular drunk.

The other thing you can do is write a strong personal essay which lets admissions people inside your....

Prom night can be a special night, if you let it be. I know you think it's for losers and something that....

Sports bars are also a great place for guys to meet other guys--either for sex or for wrestling, whichever....

Most bullies are the product of a stressful and often abusive home life. Next time a bully threatens....

Boys have penises and girls have vaginas. If they touch at the wrong time, you can make a baby or die.....