Quotes by : Rita Rudner

Men don't get cellulite. God might just be a man.

There are different kinds of humor, some is sarcastic, some introspective. Introspective fit my personality....

Men like cars women like clothes. Women only like cars because they take them to clothes.

Men like cars women like clothes. Women only like cars because they take them to clothes.

Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich....

Men like cars women like clothes. Women only like cars because they take them to clothes.

Men forget everything women remember everything. That's why men need instant replay in sports. They've....

I love to sleep. Do you? Isn't it great? It really is the best of both worlds. You get to be alive and....

Stand-up is my favorite thing I've ever done. There's so much independence.

Men will now get up and walk with the baby in the middle of the night change its diapers and give it....