Quotes by : Rita Rudner

Whenever I date a guy, I think, 'Is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?'

Men like cars women like clothes. Women only like cars because they take them to clothes.

To attract men, I wear a perfume called 'New Car Interior.'

Most men are secretly still mad at their mothers for throwing away their comic books. They would be valuable....

Men don't get cellulite. God might just be a man.

My father watched football with the sound off because he lived in fear of hearing the voice of Howard....

Men don't get cellulite. God might just be a man.

Have children while your parents are still young enough to take care of them.

I love to shop after a bad relationship. I don't know. I buy a new outfit and it makes me feel better.....

If you like easygoing monogamous men stay away from billionaires.