Quotes by : Nicki Elson

I bring the girl to a museum, try to show her a little culture, and she turns a Chihuly into a giant....

Vibrizzio? You named it! Okay, this isn’t even close to healthy.

It’s like a meatloaf.

He’s so outta my league, we’re not even playing the same sport… He’s professional soccer in Europe....

Oh.” It was one those ohs that came packed with layers of meaning — none of which merely meant oh.....

I was hoping to find a way out of here and instead found you.

You might not believe in the devil, but do you believe evil lurks in this world?

If you’re going to be a dickhead, at least have the courtesy of doing it while I have a drink in my....

You should seriously get a job planning dates for The Bachelor.

Was she on some sort of Candid Camera version of This is Your Sucky Love Life?